Friday, 5 February 2010

Just another day

"Their MASSIVE bodies look diseased, half alive, half dead.
Skin erupting in places as i Cracking..
Under the strain of having to contain SO much
So much anxiety."

Do you ever want to sit in a dark house, alone.
No one to find you and no single person to tell you what to do, what to be like.
Just sit and cry all the world away.

I'm struggling to stay okay today..
Just don't really see the point in much anymore.

The difficult thing is there is nothing, and i mean NOTHING, i can do .. about anything.
The school nurse wants me to see the doctor again next week, to help with my anxiety and depression apparently.. Not like it helps, Ive been waiting for months for counselling.
And not that anyone actually takes into account how you feel until you do something like cut yourself, and then they tell you its 'stupid' and talk to someone when you feel down.
I feel down because of stupid people treating me like a child!! grrrr..
Hate guys, hate school, parents, rules.. I want to be in charge of my OWN life and deal with my own choices on my OWNNNN, thank you very much!!

I just want to move away, forget the past, forget most the people in my life.
Can't stand peoples voices, just going on and on, louder and louder.
Feels like someones smacking my head off a brick wall and I can't make them stop.
I feel really hopeless,alone and irritated today, no control :(

But on a plus side: 313 intake.


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