Tuesday, 9 November 2010

slow and steady :)

Yesterday was my first day back on track and I'm ok.. not great but okayyy.
I need to buy myself some scales. I find smoking really helps actually.
My birthday soon (Sunday) :/ should be interesting. My mum will be flying back to the UK to see me. My boyfriends birthday is two days before mine too. I hope there wont be any fights but who am I kidding. My mum goes on to my boyfriend about how he ruined my life and she will never forgive him. While she can turn to me and say all I need now is a baby and that I live in a drug world, while I'm not even on drugs and I don't want a baby right now, I'm at college and I want to make something of myself.
Oh well I'm prepared for the worst.
Oh and another thing that's making me so upset.. Ive now got stretch marks, since Ive put on so much weight. :( I want them to go away! They are on my bum and thighs. Its awful.

Thanks for your comments :) made me smile yesterday.

I suppose see with not eating, the frame of mind, its always going to be there in the back of your mind. the guilty conscience of over eating.The struggle of hunger, but the comfort of pain. The support of people who see the world in a similar colour to you. And I miss it. I cant wait to be myself again! :)

Love x


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